Chapter 5I think teaching self-management to gifted children is important not only because of their r intense nature but also because we tend to forget that they are smart but not necessarily mature or wise: “we cannot forget that “bright children” are still children and have much to learn about getting along in the world” … “they might have and advance level of knowledge, but they don’t have equally advance wisdom” (page 92).Teaching self management is also important to provide them with a life-long learning skill. I agree with the authors (Page 86) when they say that we need to teach our gifted students not only to recognize an undesired behavior but also to think about how to improve it; they need us (parents and teachers) to guide them on what to do differently and to model for them the desired behaviors; along those lines they will be able to learn self-discipline and use it to learn throughout their lives.Teaching self management is also important to build a realistic self-esteem on the gifted child. Our gifted children (Page 87) also need to make choices to build a realistic self-esteem and to learn how to be independent. Those choices need to be made under clear guidelines, and based on an understanding of the possible consequences and their accountability. Then, -as the authors say, we must let reality be the teacher allowing the children to reflect on their decisions and build up discipline from within. Self-discipline is a slow process that requires encouragement, and practice (page 89). We must provide consistent encouragement, guidance, and allow plenty of opportunities for practice.
responding to AlvaradoO: Yes, self-discipline is a slow process. Even adults are slowly working on it all our lives. Plenty of opportunities for practice is a real key-providing procedural memory.
2nd Posting: I like page 90: Three Questions of Discipline. Recognizing the effectiveness or lack thereof, of our discipline strategies for gifted children is the first step to improving our strategies. Gifted children may be prone to outbursts, crying, hurt feelings, or imagined dangers. They need our best in helping them manage their resulting behaviors. If I focus on the behavior, rather than the child, I will have my best impact.
Response to Melanie:I also find very useful the Three Questions of Discipline. The three questions embrace not only the effectiveness of your discipline method but also the consequences that your method might have on both, your relationship with the child, and on the child's self-esteem. Being aware of these questions when redirecting a child’s behavior will definitely make us better educators.
Page 88: "Learning self-direction and self discipline is essential if giften children are to become autonomous, lifelong learners."If we don't teach our gifted kids to manage their own learning and behavior, then they will be lost outside the structure of school. They have a great curiosity and intensity that can benefit them in life, but if we don't teach them to harness and manage those traits on their own then they will never reach their full potential.
On page 105 it states "Self-discipline is necessary to withstand peer pressure and to achieve both in and out of school.However children are not born with self-discipline. They learn this vital life skill only years of practice and encouragement from signifigant adults who model it." I love everything about this quotation. It is just a reminder of how important it is as teachers that we teach our students life skills that will prepare them to be personally responsible adults.
Self discipline can make or brake any person. No matter how bright or capable someone is, if an individual is not able to control their emotions and channel them in a productive way, it is very unlikely that they will achieve success in a given enterprise. That is why it is so important for us as teachers to offer students strategies for them to learn this lifelong trait. I particularly liked the strategy offered on pg. 110 about acknowledge emotions first, then discipline, as a way to lower th child's barrier towards the adult comment and avoid power struggles.
To Dave A: Self control is indeed a life long skill to be learned and we need to prepare our students to be successful in any type of environment.
Response to JBrown: I agree with you on that quote from page 105. Self-discipline is a life-long skill that needs to be model by adults and will take time, practice and encouragement to learn. It's a skill that will help our gifted kids to be responsible as well as to develop personality capable of coping with social pressure. I believe a good teacher will mostly teach personal skills to facilitate growth rather than content.
pg. 94-95 "Fewer Rules & Boundaries"I like what's said about decreases the likelihood of power struggles and the fact that with growth & experimentation GT students matures with expanded boundaries."V" of love
@ Dave A. I agree that it is our job as teachers and as parents to ensure that our students can become lifelong learners outside of the structure of school and self-discipline plays a very important role in that learning.
@ JBrown Self-Discipline and peer pressure - it is important to teach life skills to students.
PV: It is important to teach our gifted children about self-management because it "focuses on various positive ways to teach self-monitoring and self-direction skills that will allow her to act responsibly in predictable, mutually satisfying ways and eventually lead to self-regulation" (p. 87-88). Discipline is self-direction -- developing a strong inner sense of what is right or wron and what is appropriate. For gifted children, self-direction is vital. (p. 88). It is important for gifted kids to manage their own behavior.Also, as noted on p. 89, self discipline and self-motivation are learned skills. We need to guide, encourage and support especially our gifted children by recognizing even the efforts put in.
PV: I agree with Adriana N's comment (10/6) on "Acknowledge emotions first; then address discipline (p. 110)". Just as it was mentioned in the earlier chapters of the book, emotions are neither right nor wrong and accepting a child's emotions attributes value to him/her. This can lead to a better understanding behind the child's motivation for his/her behavior and/or actions.